As a first time mom, I wanted to have everything perfect. The nursery had to be just so, the bottles were sanitized, and the house was baby proofed well before baby arrived.
With baby number two, I set the nursery up and washed just enough clothes to get started a few weeks before she was due. Oh, and diapers, oops forgot those. We had to stop at Target on the way home from the hospital to pick some up. 🤷🏼♀️
Then there was baby number three. Well all I can say about nursery is: What nursery? She does have a crib, but it’s in our master bedroom. We don’t even have a bedroom for her. I did remember diapers after what happened the last time.
It’s amazing how things change with the birth of each child. Each stage has its perks. Here’s how I adjusted and what I took away from each phase of beginning motherhood.
First Time Mom
Soak in every moment! All the excitement and anticipation of your baby’s arrival. Enjoy putting the nursery together, going through baby shower gifts and organizing all of your baby essentials. Take time for yourself and spend quality time with your husband, that time is precious and will not be as easy to carve out once your baby arrives.
Once baby is finally here. Cherish those moments as well. There’s nothing better than your first maternity leave! You can relax and enjoy your baby and new found motherhood. I didn’t realize how much of a blessing this was until I had my second maternity leave and it was not as relaxing with two! Although things may seem stressful at times, take a breath and remember moms can do anything, you will figure it out. If you choose to breastfeed, know that it’s hard the first time. But, keep at it and it will get easier. I breastfed all three of my kiddos, but I strongly believe that FED IS BEST. Do what you have to do to keep that baby fed and happy.
And Then There Were Two
Transitioning from one to two was a big shock to the system for me. I was used to spending all my time with Boston. We had so many adventures and spent a ton of time playing and learning. Then, I had to split my time. Elliana was so sweet and tiny when she was born. And as all babies do, she needed a lot of attention. Those first few weeks of breastfeeding and caring for an infant are taxing, then throw a 20 month old toddler into the mix! It gets dicey, but as always, with time things all seem to fall into place.
Some great advice I received from a dear friend on mine right before Elliana was born was that if both kids are crying or need me, make sure the baby is safe then tend to the toddler first. Also, tell the baby, “I’ll be right with you sweetheart. Boston needs mommy now.” That way Boston will know he is important and not feel brushed aside.
Although I did my best to make Boston feel included and important, he still did occasionally act out. That is totally normal. He was just looking for attention. I found that baby wearing while playing with him made both kids happy. And when Elliana was napping I made sure to spend quality time with Boston. That meant the house wasn’t always clean, but hey, they kids were happy!
Third Time’s a Charm
Well…. from one to two was hard, but two to three was crazy. Crazy wild! Crazy messes! Crazy good! Yes there are times when all three kids are crying at once, the dog is tearing apart the garbage, and my phone is ringing. CRAZY! But, as a third time Mom, I have learned to take it all in stride. Been there done that! Now don’t get me wrong. There are days, oh there are days, when I want to pull may hair out. But, at the end of the day, I know the days are long but the years are short. Yes, that’s so cliche, but it’s oh so true. I can not believe my little Boston Boy is going to be 4 this summer. Where has the time gone?
I think the most important thing I have learned as a mother is to take things one step at a time and enjoy every movement, every stage (good or bad, because they all pass so quickly. I am blessed with an age gap of 20 months between each of my children. So they are like a little team. They can push each others buttons like no other, but they also love each other so hard it hurts (Sometimes even so hard it physically hurts. Gentle hugs kids! PUT THE BABY DOWN ~ gently!)
I have found that multi-tasking is key! I’ve learned how to read a book to Boston while nursing Grace and having Elliana climb all over me. It’s not always fun, but it’s momming three at its best.
People often ask me, “Your done now, right?” My answer always is the same. For now we are, but you never know what the future holds. I feel like now that we’ve crossed the precipice of three, we can do anything!
Photo Credit for these beautiful photos Victoria Matteo Photography.
